Thursday, May 22, 2014

Rambling and ranting...

I learned to do laundry at 13. No matter how long I've done it and no matter many times I've done it, once in a while, I'm going to forget to put in the detergent or the fabric softener. Although, I never forget both. It's either one or the other. Which doesn't make sense because you'd think doing one would just have me doing the other out of habit but nope, not always.

I finally started getting the toys for tots post together from December. Not having a computer up until a week ago made getting it done pretty difficult. Though most who donated have seen all the pictures via email or Facebook already but I still want to get the post up on Monday. I learned from attempting to do that via my phone in January that blogging from a smartphone is okay if you're not typing a lot and not trying to add links and images. Doing that makes it a pain in the ass. Which is one of the biggest reasons I haven't gotten that post up and haven't blogged much lately. Having a desktop again has been great. It's an adjustment getting used to a screen that isn't the size of a playing card, though.

A co-worker a few days ago commented on how tan my legs were and went on a small rant about how she just can't get tan. She asked where I go to tan and I replied, "outside." She got really confused and asked, "is there was an outdoor tanning place or...... I.... what?" I actually had to explain I've gotten a little bronzed up from all the time I've spent at my apartment complex's pool and from going to the driving range for a few hours a couple Saturday afternoons. I don't try to get tan, I just love golf and swimming and do a lot of both when the weather's nice. She was pretty disappointed I didn't have some magic salon I was going to.

I'm a big tea drinker. I've been taking honey ginseng white tea to work lately and yesterday I had a coworker ask me if I was drinking rose water. Do people really drink that with lunch? I've never tasted it but just the smell of roses makes me queasy so I avoid anything to do with roses like the plague.

On the local news this week, there were two stories that irked me because sexism against anyone grinds my gears (Thanks, Family Guy.) One story was, "kitchen recipes men can't mess up!" and the other "kitchen gadgets so easy even a man can figure them out!" The notion that cooking and kitchen stuff is feminine and only something that women should do is dated and asinine. Some of the best cooks I know happen to be male. In fact, one of my guy friends happens to be the only person I will eat a pork tenderloin from and I couldn't tell you what it is about his that I like but I can tell you I dislike every other one I've ever had in comparison. I don't even really like pork as a general rule but dude has mad kitchen skills. Another one of my male friends makes the best homemade pasta I've ever had. I would pay him all the money in my wallet (which ranges from 75 cents to about $20) for his beautiful noodles if he weren't so happy and willing to cook for the joy of doing so and enjoying good company. So, acting like men who cook are less masculine or acting as if men are all ignorant and incompetent in the kitchen? Knock that bullshit off, you look stupid.

My previous blog post about harassment gained a lot of response from it. Both on Twitter, in comments and in emails. Some of them have been maddeningly ignorant and some downright enraging. Lost in that are three guys, one from Twitter and two others that reached out via email, who thanked me for posting it because they appreciated the perspective.

To quote one of them, "I've never realized before that my approaches could be seen or felt as threatening, scary, inappropriate or upsetting. It's just the way I saw things happening in my culture around me and I thought that there was no harm in any of it. I was taught that as long as you don't lay hands, don't yell and don't berate you're not doing anything wrong. We're also taught that sometimes women are playing hard to get which means we need to try harder. I really appreciate reading your perspective here and the way you explained it, I realize now that I'm doing it wrong and that I've unintentionally probably made a lot of women uncomfortable without trying or even knowing I was doing so. That's upsetting because I'd never want to make anyone feel bad or unsafe. I will work to do better from now on." 

The other two echoed those sentiments in a very similar fashion and I can't tell you how happy them reaching out and telling me those things in the midst of all the negativity and ignorance made me. You guys rock and I sincerely hope you all meant it when you said you'd be striving to do better. :)

I should be finishing up other things right now instead of rambling on here. I have to be at work shortly and I'm still in need of running a brush through my hair and putting on some eyeliner. Oh and putting together the delicious orange chicken I'm taking for lunch. If anyone steals my lunch today (rarely happens but when it does....) they'll be getting cut. Or cookie dough thrown at their face. Or handing me over cash or going to buy me food from somewhere. Either way, unpleasantness will fall upon them in some way or another.

Happy Pre-Friday!


osbasso said...

You golf?? I had no idea!

Eric said...

"outside" is a confusing concept to a lot of people these days sadly. that you golf surprises me but very cool!

love the sexism rant and love that your post actually made a few people think and reconsider the way they conduct themselves. good for you! makes dealing with the negativity worth it to know you've reached a few people on an important level.