Since I ended up ranting, I would also like to rant about something else. I'm SO FUCKING TIRED of people telling me I need a job. Really? I didn't fucking notice yet. Thanks so much for cluing me in. I've gone on 9 job interviews in the last 7 days. I have another job interview tomorrow and am supposed to be hearing back from a few some time this week. It's not for my lack of trying that I'm not employed. I had one friend who kept saying it so I screen capped a bunch of stuff to show how many places I've submitted a resume to, how many places I've applied to online and etc so he would shut the fuck up. And he did. And apologized because he said he honestly didn't think I'd be looking so hard. Which I can see coming from someone who has worked for the same company for 8 years and hasn't had the pleasure of trying to find a job lately. The week before last, I applied to 23 different places. I got 3 call backs in all that. I've applied to so many places, it's ridiculous. I've gone on more than the interviews I've just mentioned recently too. I've heard so many different excuses on why I didn't get a job and then not heard back from many more. I've had several assholes try to hit on me during an interview which I just can't deal with. I had one guy that was interviewing me actually SNIFF ME and tell me I smelled good and ask what kind of perfume I was wearing as we were walking in to sit down and begin the interview. He asked me ONE work related question and then spent the next 30 minutes flirting while I filled out an assessment worksheet and pretty much ignored all of his attempts at flirting and trying to find out personal information. He called me sweetie, I informed him my name was Ashly and I would appreciate him using that instead. Obviously, I didn't get that job and probably for a good reason. I could see that was going to be a sexual harassment issue waiting to happen and I probably would have ended up punching him in the face. And yet, I sat there and seriously contemplated for a couple minutes if I should just deal with it for the money because I need a job that badly. I contemplated on it, thinking I'd keep looking and quit when I found another job. It didn't matter anyway because once I told him not to call me sweetie or any other pet name because I found it unprofessional and inappropriate, I think he realized I wouldn't be having any of his shit and that "opportunity" went right back out the window. Which, like I said, was probably for the best because that wouldn't have ended well. I don't tolerate that kind of shit, at all. I got way off track, though. My original point here is that I'm sick of people telling me I need a job. No one knows that better than I do. I'm also sick of people assuming that since I'm still unemployed, I just must not be trying hard enough. FUCK YOU. That's all I do. I apply to jobs, I sit at home. I don't go out. I don't go anywhere unless it's to go on a walk to clear my head, go pick up job applications, take applications back or go on a job interview. That's what my days consist of unless I get lucky and stumble across an odd job to make some cash. Which I'll cover here in a minute. Most of my time spent online is applying for whatever I can find to apply to online. I've even been applying to some of the crap on craigslist that's just for making some money here and there. Which is helpful even though it's not ever big sums of money. I'll take whatever little odd job I can find for some cash as long as it's legal and doesn't compromise my safety in any way.
So having people assume I'm lazy or assume I'm not trying or catching people talking shit about me is really pissing me off lately. And normally, I don't care what people say about me. And at first, I didn't let it bother me when I had people saying that stuff to me. I knew what they were assuming but I also knew that it wasn't true so I didn't care. Now it's just getting annoying because I'm already super stressed, extremely frustrated and it's hard enough to try and stay optimistic about shit when you've been trying for months and haven't had anything work out. It's hard to just keep going out and trying constantly and not get defeated and completely down on yourself. It's exhausting mentally and emotionally. Some days, I've wanted to just lay in bed and sleep all day because I feel so down about shit but I won't let myself do that. So lately, I'm just ignoring the people who say it or going off on them and then ignoring them. I don't need any one's negativity when I'm trying to keep my own from weighing on me too much, lol.
Happy Monday!Leave a comment please?