Monday, May 24, 2010

Rant, rant, rant...

I had originally planned to post my review of the LELO Gigi today but.... after my interview yesterday afternoon, I started feeling really crappy again. I had been feeling sick for around 2 weeks, then I felt better for a few days, then yesterday it hit me again and I started feeling like shit. I spent most of the afternoon and evening laying in bed so I didn't get my review completed. Even though I spent most of the day in bed, I didn't sleep at all. Awesome. I hope this shit doesn't get worse. NyQuil, do your best, okay? Thanks.

Speaking of the interview, it lasted for a little over an hour and a half. The other two girls that got there at the same time as me left 30 and 45 minutes before I did. I swear, if I spent that much time talking to that dude and it doesn't result in a job; I'm going to pull my hair out. That was my 4th interview in 3 days. I have 2 more today, which I will hopefully feel better for. Then I have another on Tuesday. If none of these work out, I might possibly have a nervous breakdown. Not really. I'm too strong for that. :D It's just so damn frustrating and I'm so broke. And not like other people who are "broke" but have their parents giving them money for gas, eating out, seeing movies, buying junk they don't even need, spending time with friends, etc. I have a friend who's unemployed and not even looking because between her parents and her husband, she's got her bills and other expenses covered. Yet, she always complains about being broke because them giving her money "doesn't count" because it's not "her own" money. I go to job interviews and sometimes have to have my boyfriend take me to them because it's the only way I'll get there. And then I sit at home the rest of the time bored out of my head and trying not to feel worthless because I'm not working. That's not even the half of the troubles either so don't judge based on that but that's pretty much all I'm willing to share, honestly. So, it annoys me when people whine and complain to me about how "tough" they have it when they're doing better than a lot of other people are. And it irritates me more when they don't even realize they don't have it as bad as they think they do. It makes me want to bash their heads in and open their eyes. Hell, even as shitty as stuff has been for us lately, there are still people who have it worse off than we do. So, I don't complain which is why you've not seen me blogging or tweeting about anything like that over the last several months. Though, my mom was awesome and wired me some money (my family lives in CA) for medicine and stuff last week because I couldn't afford any medicine. If you're someone online and this upsets or offends you, it was only a rant about people in my real life so don't take it personally. Though, if you do take it personally, you might want to think about why it irks you. But anyway. Sorry, didn't mean to rant there, lol.

Seriously can't believe the Blackhawks swept the Sharks yesterday for the Western Conference finals. Now the Blackhawks will be playing in the Stanley Cup Final... against either the Flyers or the Habs. I honestly expected Chicago to win it. I predicted they would do it in 5 games. Possibly 6. I didn't think they'd straight up sweep the Sharks in 4 straight games. I expected the Sharks would have a little fight in them and at least win one game. Oh well, though. Now to see who from the East is going to make it. Most people I know are on the Philly bandwagon now since they're leading the series.

I have comment moderation on right now just because of the annoying amount of spam comments from bots. Also from an annoying "anonymous" person who keeps trying to engage me in some petty online bullshit. I don't get sucked into drama very much in my real life. I'm damn sure not getting sucked into internet drama. It's just stupid. Plus, I know who it is and why they're pissed at me. If they (you) want to discuss anything, they (you) can e-mail me and act like a mature, grown, adult.

While I was laying in bed last night at some point, I was watching In & Out with the boyfriend. I hadn't watched it in a few years, though. I saw a news story on the local news that reminded me of it for some reason, so I got into my CD/DVD binder and pulled it out, happy I still had it and happy it wasn't scratched.
While I don't think the ending is all that realistic in most cases (which is sad because I would love to see the opposite be true!) I do love that movie. It's one of my absolute favorite feel-good movies.

I'm done now. I'm going to take some medicine and pass the fuck out right now. Hopefully, I'll feel better tomorrow.

Happy Monday!
Xo.


Leave a comment? :)

10 comments:

phairhead said...

feel better soon :D

Charlene said...

Be strong!

Really, there is no other choice but to be so.

Lisa Subrosa said...

The biggest lesson I took away from one of my favorite books, The Art of Happiness by H.H. the Dalai Lama, was the direct correlation between the amount of happiness and satisfaction we feel in our lives and whether we choose to compare ourselves to those who have it worse than we do vs. those who we think have it better. It's very true. When you think of the residents of Appalachia, for example, the poverty there and lack of opportunity for even a decent education and no way possible to collect enough funds to relocate... The sheer hopelessness of their situation makes it much easier to appreciate what you have vs. the frustration and anger you may feel thinking about those who (often undeservingly) won the lottery or whose parents had enough money to send them to Harvard, etc.

I hope you get that job. It sounds promising! :)

Emmy said...

Hope you feel better soon!

And I hope one of these jobs works out for you. I went crazy unemployed, so I understand what you are going through in terms of wanting something to do. Oh, and the money - the money is never a bad thing either. :)

Good luck!
~Emmy

Just A. Girl said...

Get well soon... and cheer up too. Interviews are so hard. It's like putting yourself on display and hoping they buy. Ugh.

Anonymous said...

Sorry you are sick and having a rough time. But you're right, from what I've read and seen you are a strong person and will succeed. Not to focus on me, but, I get aggravated because I have clinical depression and I have a great life. I have no real reason to be depressed. I have a great husband, friends, close to my family now, a house, etc. yet still I feel so bad. It confuses me. So I do try to remind myself, like you said, that other people have it really bad.
Anyway. Good luck with finding a job. I'm sure the right one will come along. Thank you for sharing.

Student Lingerie said...

Hope you feel better soon! It sucks that the work situation sucks at the moment, though with you last interview it does look promising!

Wish you lived over here as we'd take you on as its so difficult to find decent staff!

Tim said...

I feel your pain on some of it, and don't on others. . . I've been lucky enough to have my parents bail me out in emergency type situations, but I have literally been so broke I had to start selling things to pay utility bills/rent. . . I went through a period of my life where I didn't have a job for like 2 years. . . It's amazing to me that some really good people in life have to struggle just to make ends meat, but that there are so many over-privileged kids and people out there that spend all their time bitching and whining about the sour grapes they have to deal with. . .

Kinda makes me mad, too. . . *sigh* Oh, well. Not even fate knows why things happen the way they do. . .

Mistress L said...

Get better hun!

Bruce said...

I go back and forth between hating my job and realizing how much I might hate having NO job. Somedays it is a toss up. Such is life when you work in the public sector. But job interview after job interview does get tiring....best of luck on the job search....hope you find a job you LOVE and not just a paycheck.