Monday, January 4, 2010

Here's an update...

My grandfather has been in the hospital. If you've read my blog long enough, you'll know that I don't blog about my family and familial goings on very often. I try to leave stuff about them off of my blog. Once in a while, I do blog about family stuff. If you've read my blog for long enough or know me well enough, you know that I'm close with my grandparents. In that, I'm lucky that I've gotten the time to spend with them. To know them and to have them in my life. I know that and don't need to hear it because frankly, it's not comforting when one of them is very near death. I appreciate the person saying it might be trying to help in some way or might be trying to say something less generic to let me know that in time things will be fine. I get it and while I appreciate the thought and possible sentiment behind it, I already know those things and again I appreciate it but it seems a bit like a slap in the face to have my sadness countered with, "Well, at least you had them be a part of your life so chin up and be happy about that." While I am lucky and happy about them and the time I've had with them, seriously, it doesn't really help to hear something like that. Anyway... Grandpa's heart failed him a few days ago. He had to be rushed to the hospital. Grandma had to sign off on an emergency surgery for him. Three hours of surgery and then he was put in to ICU. He had to be in ICU for 24-36 hours before they would move him to an isolation room where he would be checked on every hour. My grandmother and aunts have been staying with him at the hospital during the day and then one of my aunts spends the night with him while my grandmother goes home to eat, get her bath and hopefully get some sleep. Then she's back bright and early and spend about 12 or more hours sitting in the hospital with my grandpa. In all honesty, it's looking rather bleak and I don't expect he'll be with us much longer. Though, I would love it if he did make progress and turn around and live another few years. My grandfather is tough. He's battled cancer and other illnesses for over 10 years now and we've heard several times before after visits in the hospital that he wouldn't make it home. Only, he always has bounced back and kept on keeping on. Except... He's now 87 years old and this time, I don't think he's going to bounce back. He's not able to do anything for himself currently and... I don't really want to post details right now. Not because I don't have them but because it's just too hard for me to put the words down right now. I know how I would explain everything but I just can't right now. I spent 5 and 1/2 hours sitting at the hospital yesterday with my grandma and grandpa. Boyfriend was there too and so was one of my aunts for a while. My other aunt left when we got there. It was so touching and heartbreaking watching my grandma care for him.

That's where my head has been lately and I'm just upset and worried, like everyone else in my family is. Every time my phone goes off, I get anxious and start worrying before I ever say hello and it's not good news. So bleh.
I don't have much else to say. I'm not religious but if you want to pray for my family, go for it. A lot of my family is Christian and keep saying their prayers. A lot of my friends are doing the same. Happy thoughts, positive energy, good juju, whatever you want to call it; that's all good too. I appreciate everyone who has offered their thoughts and e-hugs already. *smile*

Hope y'all have a good day.
Happy Monday.

18 comments:

Vanilla Kinks said...

Hey AR. I knew something was up from your Twitter updates, but I really wasn't sure what it was.

I could say all the crap everyone else says at times like this, but it's just that, CRAP!

Stay strong. Take good care of yourself. I'll think positive thoughts for your grandfather and your family.

chocdrop said...

Family is so important. You support them and we will try and support you from a distance.
Keep smiling....you want him to remember your smile!!!!

Take care of you
Thinking of you and your family

phairhead said...

sending positive thoughts yr way.


(((((HUGS))))))

southerngirl said...

BIG HUGS AR...

My thoughts are with you baby.

XO

ShellSpann said...

Take care of you, and we'll all be thinking about you and your family.

*HUGS*

Mina said...

You don't need to explain to us why you can't write about it. You don't ever have to share the details. I wish you well. I know all about the anxiety with phone calls. When my father was in the hospital, it was the same for me. Even after the dreaded phone call happened, it took weeks before the phone ringing wouldn't make me feel ill or make my pulse race. I'm here if you need me.

xo Mina

Margaret said...

Again - hugs.

That's all I got.

peace...

Southern Sage said...

Good JuJu AR.

Hope it works out for all y'all.

BTExpress said...

When my wife was sick, I heard many of the same things. The comment I hated most was about her getting better. Everyone knew she had a terminal illness, but still said it. I wanted so badly to tell them the to shut the fuck up, because they didn't know shit. We all knew she wouldn't get better, only worse. Those words just made me feel worse, not better.

I'll keep you all in my prayers. ((((HUG))))

viemoira said...

You never cease to amaze me, still ends the post with a smile. Thinking of you and your family. *hugs*

Bruce said...

Thanks for the update. Take your time to concentrate on whats important to you right now. We will still be here when the dust settles.

Joker_SATX said...

The Joker and all his inmates are thinking of you at this time.

Another Suburban Mom said...

I am thinking about you. I hope that your grandfather gets better enough to go home.

nitebyrd said...

Hun, I'm sorry to hear this. I do hope your grandfather will pull through, again.

He'll be in my "prayers" when I light my candle tonight as will you and your grandmother.

(((HUGS)))

moresexchocolateandredlipstick said...

Honey, that sucks. I hope that you're okay and I'm thinking of you and your family and sending you good vibes.

----Amy xxxx

Secretia said...

It is always so touching to see people who are together so very long showing their love all their lives through. I wish your family comfort and peace through this ordeal.

Secretia

Chickie said...

Keeping you and your Grandpa in my thoughts.

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