Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Some people, baby, it's something I don't understand....

I know people go out to eat for a variety of reasons. No time to cook a meal, they just feel like going out, it's more convenient, they can't cook, they're not in the mood to cook, they're not in the mood to have to prep, cook and clean up, etc etc etc. I'm all fine with that. Without those reasons and more, people would always stay home for their meals and drinks and if they never went out, I wouldn't have a job. I don't mind working in the service industry. A lot of people look down on it, a lot of people think a lot of bullshit about it. Whatever, fuck you. What I do hate is people who come in, make a huge mess and then leave. Would you fucking use your finger to get excess honey mustard off your chicken at home and then wipe the extra sauce on the table top? I fucking think not. If you do, that's nasty. So why when you go out somewhere else, do you think it's okay to do things like that? Do you throw lettuce and used napkins on the floor at home? Nope, didn't think so. Do you wipe ketchup and other condiments on your table top when you use too much? No? Well, shucks. Oh what's that? When you have ice cream at home, you don't fling whipped cream underneath the table or smear it on top of the table because you got more than you want? You don't let your kids pour condiments out on the table just for kicks at home? You don't chunk your excess bread or uneaten veggies onto the ground underneath the table possibly saving them for another while currently getting them off your plate and out of your sight? Well, I'll be damned!

You don't do that shit at home because A)It's unacceptable behavior. B)It's disgusting and not that sanitary. C)If you or your family make messes like that at home, you're going to have to be the one to fucking clean them up. D)It's fucking disgusting. (Yes, I had to go there twice.)

I get that part of my job is cleaning up after the customers are done at their tables. I get that, really I do. Mostly, I don't mind. Pick up some napkins, some straw wrappers maybe, discard what ever is left and yadda yadda. Seriously though, you don't have to make a huge mess just because you're not the one that has to clean it up. Just because we get paid for our job doesn't mean you can make an even bigger mess either. We have plenty of work to do to keep us busy, you don't need to add on to it by being a disgusting slob.

You don't want pickles on your burger? Fine. When you order it, say you don't want the fucking pickles on it. Don't know what comes on it? ASK. Most of us know our menus pretty well and if you want to know something we don't know about an item, we can always ask someone who does know. You don't want to be a pain with a special order? You're more of a pain when you hold off and then when you get your food just pull off what you don't want and lay it on the table or drop it on the ground. It doesn't magically disappear people. If you won't ask for whatever you don't want on something, get a napkin and put it in there. Use an extra plate and lay it there. Leave it on your own fucking plate and push it to the side. Just don't throw it around.

You got too much ranch on your salad? Too much mayo on your burger? Too much whipped cream on your sundae? Scraping off the extras and then wiping them on top of the table is gross. Do you really want to sit there eating with ranch or some other condiment smeared on your table? I wouldn't. Don't have enough napkins given to you? ASK FOR ME. We have PLENTY and will happily give you more if it means we don't have to scrub at mayo that's been sitting there for 40 minutes.

I get that you're happy you're not having to cook or clean when you go out. Who wouldn't be? It's nice to let someone else worry about that stuff for the night. I don't expect people to clean their own tables up but making a bigger mess than necessary is just ridiculous. It's not just little kids who make these messes. I'm talking teenagers, twenty-somethings and even middle aged people just throwing stuff here and there and wiping gunk everywhere. I even asked a lady once, semi recently, if she needed more napkins because I noticed she was pulling lettuce off her sandwich and tossing it to the ground. She shrugged and said she didn't want any napkins but thanks anyway. The she giggled to her friend and said she wouldn't be cleaning the mess up anyway so what did she care? I pulled out the ice pick then, watching her smug little look crumble right off her bitchy face as I cracked her skull open.... in my imagination.

I know not all servers are nice. Some are bitchy. Some act like they just don't care to be bothered with you. Some would rather flirt with other customers and co-workers. Blah blah blah. Those people suck. Making a mess on your table and the surrounding area isn't the way to get back at a rude server though. Remember, your server isn't always the one who will be cleaning up after you leave. Even if they are going to have to clean it up, they're just going to gripe about it. Want to piss them off for their bad attitude or shitty service? DON'T TIP THEM. That's worse than making a mess they probably won't have to clean up.


Britni TheVadgeWig said...

I completely agree with you here. While I have never worked in the service industry, the majority of my friends have. It's just so disrespectful to make a mess and expect someone else to clean it up just because "it's their job." If I pick something off my food, I put it on a side plate, or at worst, a napkin. If I spill something, I try to clean it up. I don't rip straw wrappers up into a million tiny pieces.

I worked retail for years and it drove me nuts when people would pick something up to look at it and then put it back RIGHT NEXT TO THE SPOT IT BELONGED IN. Like, is it really that much effort to put it back where you got it? I can MAYBE understand if you carried something to the other end of the store and then decided to put it down, but not when you are standing right next to where it goes! That's just rude. I still find myself straightening shelves and displays in stores when I'm in them and ALWAYS put things back where they go, even if I'm across the store.

People are assholes.

phairhead said...

most people are fucking fools. when the revolution comes, i plan on executing thousands of idiots.

food service is tough, man. i washed dishes in my mother's bakery one summer. the horror! the horror!

Another Suburban Mom said...

If it makes you feel better, I always put everything neatly on my plate when I am finished and tip well, because I know that service jobs can suck!

Oh, and I wasn't raised by goats and all. I hate when people don't practice common freakin courtsey.

Confessor X said...

I use to be a server at an Italian resturant which had busboys that did most of the cleaning, but I was always there helping out. And even to this day, if I eat out I ALWAYS clean up after myself and make sure there isnt a mess...

and I agree with the statement, some people are douches...plain and simple!

Slyde said...

here here! I am routinely disgusted by the behaviour i see people display when i go out eating publically....


Kinky Aoefe said...

My sister who has two degrees, one in education says her favorite job is serving. She made more money doing it too, so don't let anyone tell you its not a valid job. As for cleaning up, I always pile all our garbage on one plate and put the dirty napkins in a ball, I know what I'd think if I had to clean it up. My kids are being trained the same way - god some people ARE gross!

southerngirl said...

Feel you AR. IMO, you have certainly earned today's rant.

I DID work in the industry for a long ass time and it is hard to stay cheery and helpful when that entitlment-disregard attitude prevails among your customers.

We all need to show a bit more respect for each other no matter what job we are doing.

I will gladly come patronize your place and give them hell if anyone dares to be nasty...just sayin'

flyinfox-satx said...

Good Rant! When I go out or take my family out, I demand good behavior out of all of them. And my server always starts with a 20% tip just for me walking in the door. The percentage goes down with every blatant infraction such as taking forever to deliver the meal or consciously ignoring a request, etc.

Bruce said...

Sounds like someone needs a vacatin.

C. Louis Wolfe said...

First off AR, I'd like to THANK YOU for checkin' out my stuff...er, blog I mean. I'm honored! I will attempt to thrill, entertain, & amuse you with nothing! ;^)~

As for your post, I have dated several waitresses (or is servers more PC?-Eff-it!)- LOVE a woman in uniform- & they have trained me well. If I make a mess, which I rarely do, I tip a bit more. I eat out ALL the time which I enjoy, even though my wallet does not! I've been in the peeps dealin' biz for almost 25 years now & would NEVER or could ever do what you do. Sympathy, empathy, & props to you!

Spiky Zora Jones said...

I was a waitress while in High school and college.
Some people are discustingly pigish, just plain nasty dill wads.

I know the business and I treat our servers with dignity and I always tip about 20% of the bill. hell I like to talk to them if they have time.

I've had my share of bad servers too. In in Las Vegas...he ignored us and spent his time at another table...he would have made a mint with us in tips. He was not tipped and a complaint was put to the manager by some in our party.

I don't complain...I just never go back. And when asked, I tell the truth about the restaurant.

ciao honey...oh...do you get to meet any interesting people? I've met quite a few and my one friend waited on a few movie stars.

13messages said...

On a semi-related note, I had a brief fling with a sexy girl who didn't believe in tipping. We were pretty much done as soon as she told me that. The thing that made it weird though was that she used to be a restaurant server. I couldn't wrap my head around that.

Here's hoping you get the cool people from now on out. It's important to me that I always leave with a clean table and a good tip.