Friday, May 29, 2009

I'm so happy without you...

It's time for Fuck You Friday! Know what I'm saying fuck you to today?

Backseat drivers.

I can't stand that.

Especially when you're in a city the backseat driver has never even been in before and they STILL think they can direct you every place you need to go. Even though they couldn't tell you where anything is there, they still want to go running their jaws off like an idiot.

I can't stand the backseat driver that chimes in half the car ride with directions and comments about how you should be driving or turn here or blah blah blah but when they do it almost constantly every minute or two? Oh my gosh! Especially when you can't insult them or tell them to zip it enough times to get them to stop it because insulting them and/or telling them to shut their know it all fucking mouth does nothing because they just don't care.

Pretending to ignore them works okay though. If they're not one to do it constantly but just here and there, I can handle that.

Someone who does it continually and doesn't shut up though? Being a sarcastic little ass makes me feel a little better some times too. Like when they warn you to get out of a lane because you some how might not see that big ass FedEx/UPS truck parked in the street or telling you to pick another street because hey, you can't go back down a one way street in the opposite direction. Then a smart ass comment to follow those necessary tips might shut them up for a couple minutes. Maybe.

Oh and no, I've never been a driver having to deal with a backseat driver. Only an annoyed passenger wishing the driver would say shut the hell up since the backseat driver doesn't listen to other passengers. Even when they're threatening maiming and death.

Even when I want to go nuts on the backseat driver that constantly feels the need to chime in every few minutes with a new direction or some other notion, if the actual driver is ignoring them and asks me to just bear with it and try to tune them out, I'll be nice. Actually, I'll just be respectful to the driver and skip out on finding some object in the car to smash over the mouthy little passenger's head.


Bruce said...

This is why taxi cabs have glass partitions.

alexandra jane said...

nearly all my friends are backseat drivers. bad ones too. i am a great driver and they all suck and i am the one that gets told what to do.

KBear said...

hehe. I'm bad for this.. I am a backseat driver, and a passenger seat driver.. although I warn people about it, and tell them to tell me to shush when I get to be too much, cause I don't realize I'm being annoying. I think I'm being helpful.. I don't do it cause I think you suck as a driver, I do it cause I'm a nervous driver, and I can't shut my mouth. I talk and say what's on my mind, and well, I do it even when IM driving - it's a thing I do to keep myself from freaking out and thinking we're going to die..yeah, I'm that nervous in a car:)

rage said...

Most of the backseat drivers I know ride shotgun. Psst.